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 The Agency

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Melexiious
The Fabulous


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Registration date : 2012-01-15

PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Tue Jul 29, 2014 3:45 pm

"Lets go.. left, I guess. Might as well, I have no real idea on which is a better choice, perhaps you could look down.. or.. something." Umbrage said, as his confidence slowly dwindled as he spoke to the small eldritch abomination who is now only legal in a number of countries he could count on his hand.

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Tunnel Snakes Rule



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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Tue Jul 29, 2014 5:36 pm

Tile by tile, No. 351 and Mr. Lister finally found the correct pattern. Lister reached for his flashlight and lead the way across the trap, saying the pattern as he went along.
When the duo reached the end of the trap, they were faced with a choice, to turn left, to turn right, or to continue ahead. Lister turned to No. 351 and said "So, where do you think we should go? I wouldn't have made it across without you so it's only fair that you choose where we go next. As far as I can see with my enhanced eyesight, straight will keep going for another few hundred meters, probably riddled with traps and other things designed to kill you in the most clichéd way possible."
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Orandulum
Spurt Reynolds


Number of posts : 281
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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Fri Aug 01, 2014 12:48 pm

"forward isn't an option it's probably filled with more deadly traps my companion can't survive it's it far to boring. So either left or right... No.351 fired a a finger tip down the right passageway. After about 5 seconds there was the sound of bone hitting leather. This was quickly followed by several very loud roars and rattling chains.

"left it is" The Fleshmancer turned on his heel and began to stride down the left corridor.

((Sorry for holding the RP up also I'm posting this from work on my phone so I'm gonna send esh character individually))
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Orandulum
Spurt Reynolds


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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Fri Aug 01, 2014 1:09 pm

Naṣāru in a position very new to him, he was trying to comprehend the human in front of him, and failing."that's certainly a... unique perspective on the situation. But The 5000 year old being didn't survive as long as he had by being incapable of dealing with the unknown. Just to be safe though, he decided against engaging in further conversation with the ukulele wielder unless needed. Seeing that the Elven death puppet had caught fire due to a trap, Nas walked over to it and pulled out a crude iron sword. Holding the sword above Its head a trickle of water came down which doused the flames.
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Cracked Atlas
His Sexcellency


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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Fri Aug 01, 2014 8:58 pm

"...and then I said to Doctor, "That's not a leech, that's my penis." Ahahaha... uh... maybe you had to be there." Alise continued to flick drops of blood ahead of the party every now and then to test for traps. "Hmm... does this blank section of wall look familiar to you? I mean, it should, as it's identical to the last dozen sections of wall but... Eh, I'm sure we'll find a way through eventually." Alise went to move on before stopping, and drawing a small line on the wall with her blood. Nodding to herself, she continued forward. "Anyway, I told you my penis story, what about you? Got any interesting stories? Not, you know, necessarily ones about your penis. On second thought, mine might've been a little unprofessional..." Alise trailed off.

Meanwhile, Number 351 and Lister's efforts had paid off. Leaving the corridor they had been in, they came across a massive circular chamber. Around the edges of the chamber was a small path, with periodic openings in the wall, similar to the one they had just come from. Standing on one edge, it was just possible to see the openings on the edge opposite. A large hole filled up the majority of the center of the chamber, with path winding slowly down on the outer portion of the hole. At the bottom of the hole were three figures standing by... something. It was a long way down.

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1337ness_of_teh_n00b
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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Fri Aug 01, 2014 11:12 pm

"Woah, thanks man, almost lost our trap-finder and rhythm guitarist for a moment."

Shred thought for a moment.

"Is he likely to suffer serious damage from brief flamey bouts? Like, can we ignite him on stage during guitar solos?"

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Orandulum
Spurt Reynolds


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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Sat Aug 02, 2014 4:08 pm

"Well if you just covered him in gasoline and put a match to him, I imagine it would have an adverse effect, but maybe if you could get him to wield-" Wait "What am I doing, I'm meant to stop him from desecrating that corpse, not help him" what the hell was going on. "Look, Shred, why don't talk about something else. Uh... wanna talk about swords?"

No.351 gazed down the hole at the 3 silhouettes, they were almost definitely the enemy. The most effective strategy for taking the enemy on 2v3 would be to use Shock and Awe protocol #4. He looked Mr. Lister standing next to him. Shock and Awe protocol #4 would also definitely kill my ally from this height" he needed more information.

"At what point down those stairs would you be able to safely jump down to the floor with in 5 seconds?"
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Melexiious
The Fabulous


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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Sat Aug 02, 2014 7:56 pm

Umbrage was incredibly confused, How did the one-armed man grab a hold of so many different crates of yogurt, and for what purpose? How could a man with a fist stuck up a horses ass could fight off so many robot ninjas? And most importantly, how could so many penises be collected into one bag without them all decomposing? He quickly shook these questions out of his head and scratched his scalp. He was once scared of Alise, now he's more just... confused. Regardless, Alise asked him a question and he intended to answer. Umbrage slowly walked with Alise, stopping when she stopped so she could set of any traps that lay before them.

"Well, I got one story I guess, I was 15 years old and I was tasked with killing the long lost son of Rasputin as a rite of ini..."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K9yuDdCyQhs
"...nd I said, what!? That's not me! That's just my robotic clone!... and that's how I learned mastery in sword fighting." Umbrage said, lighting up to Alise.

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Tunnel Snakes Rule



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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Sun Aug 03, 2014 2:22 am

Lister peeked down "I can jump from here and use my grapple hook a few times across the little markings on the wall, it'll take a minute or two to get down to a safe range, but once I'm in a safe spot I can snipe them from a distance. These things look like they can take a lot of punishment, so if you want to jump down and do what you do best to one of them that could work.
Worst case scenario I can hook the back of one of them and keep it off you for a bit while you take another one down. What exactly /can/ you do to these guys anyway? I don't think trial and error will work with our lives on the line like this."
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Orandulum
Spurt Reynolds


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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Mon Aug 04, 2014 12:58 am

Ok, It seemed as though Shock and Awe protocol 4 was completely out of the question, a different plan would be required. "Alright, new plan. You get into sniping posistion and signal when ready. I'll then jump down and deploy a smokescreen within which I will begin harassing them up close whilst you fire from above. This should serve a dual purpose of buying time for the arrival of our comrades whilst allowing us to get a better understanding of the enemy we face. It is possible though doubtful that we will also be able to drain them of some of their strength in the course of the operation."
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1337ness_of_teh_n00b
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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Mon Aug 04, 2014 5:28 pm

"Oooh, I like swords.

Think you can get me one?

Shit, what's that noise?

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Tunnel Snakes Rule



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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Wed Aug 06, 2014 5:44 pm

Lister handed No. 351 a small earpiece. "Take this. When you hear my signal, go nuts" And with that Lister was off, grappling from one side to another finding the perfect spot. When he had found it, he fastened the hook to his belt, expanded his sniper rifle and aimed down. When he found the angle that would give him an absolute minimum of 2 hits, with a possible 4 in richochet, he signalled "Testing... Check, one, two. Check. Can you hear me? You probably can... Okay on three. Ein, dos, three!" Lister fired his rifle, penetrating one guardian and lodging the bullet in the next.
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Orandulum
Spurt Reynolds


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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Thu Aug 07, 2014 6:52 pm

Whilst Lister was getting into position No.351 began his preparations. A good 10th of the liquid in the tank drained into his body, followed by ripples in the skin around his stomach. Upon receiving the signal, he jumped off the edge and vomited towards the enemy. It was just regular vomit unlike his previous acid vomit, but the waste from his transformation needed to be expelled somehow and with any luck it'd get in the eyes of one of those down below. Hitting the ground with a loud bang No.351 immediately spewed forth a thick gas from his mouth. A natural form of what amounted to mustard gas quickly filled the area. Thankfully he didn't need to see the enemy as even with his eyes closed, the three bodies were basically neon signs to his bioelectricity sense. From the same position he landed in the fleshmancer jumped in an arc towards the member of the enemy that Lister wouldn't be able to get a piercing hit on, based on his position. As the previously named "hulkomancer" approached his target, he readied his arms to grab the enemy and, theoretically, rip them in two using appropriate weakspots and his momentum.
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Cracked Atlas
His Sexcellency


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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Wed Aug 13, 2014 2:46 am

((Apologies for the pause in content friends. I hate being the one to hold this up, and it was mostly just the RP slipping my mind whilst house-sitting with 1337ness. We're back in action now, though.))

"Damn thing! How the fuck're we meant to figure out a puzzle in some God-fucking dead language that no one's ever heard of!? Jesus Fucking Christ!" Dalia Mendoza slammed the pedestal in anger. "Look, sis, I hate this whole puzzle solving bullshit as much as you do, but breaking the damn thing ain't gonna help." Eva sighed. "I don't suppose you're going to help?" Eva turned to the third member of her party.
"Don't be short with me, filly. I already told you I don't recognise the language." Alpha took a closer look at the pedestal. "Shocking, I know. Language is perhaps alien? Look, you figure this out I uh... Huh.". Alpha stopped short.
"What is it, Alpha?"
Alpha turned back to the pair of supernatural twins. "Nothing you two can't handle, I'm sure. Just keep your heads up."
"Whaddaya mean heads... oh fuck."
Suddenly noticing the falling abomination and the rain of acid heading towards them, the twins leaped out of the way, narrowly avoiding the falling stream. Alpha remained still, the vomit falling around him, but none landing on him. As 351 began to spew his mustard gas, the twins recovered, and in unnatural synchronicity, Jumped above the rolling gas, clinging to the walls on either side of the pit. Down below, Alpha watched bemused as the gas flowed around him, as if an invisible force field protected him from it. Then 351 pounced at him. The grin left his face and he carelessly raised a hand, freezing 351 in place.
"I'll let you girls take it from here, eh? Try not to screw up too hard. The Director would like to see the Core recovered." Alpha began to lazily walk up the ramp surrounding the pit, as the gas began to dissipate.

Meanwhile, by a stroke of bad storytelling pure coincidence, Shred and Nas arrived on the scene, entering the central chamber through another of the archways at the top of the pit.

Meanwhile, Alise and Umbrage were still lost.
"...and /that/ is how I was voted China's sexiest Emperor for the third year running. Actually, come to think of it, the competition may've been rigged."
Alise shrugged, and continued to walk down the corridor.

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Last edited by Cracked Atlas on Tue Aug 19, 2014 12:32 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Orandulum
Spurt Reynolds


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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Wed Aug 13, 2014 6:11 pm

"Ah combat" Naṣāru turned away from the scene below him to look at Shred. "Come, bard of mine. Hold tight to me and we shall ride into battle". Nas resumed facing the pit and then proceeded to conjure a pair of Wind-and-fire wheels. Which he placed next to each of his feet. It was time to make an entrance.
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1337ness_of_teh_n00b
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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Fri Aug 15, 2014 1:59 pm

Shred still wasn't entirely sure what a bard actually did, but striking a ninja pose seemed appropriate.

Unfortunately, this involved not strumming, so he dropped Elfy-Elf to the floor. Gently. He couldn't risk his rhythm guitarist getting hurt.

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1337ness_of_teh_n00b
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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Sat Aug 16, 2014 9:55 pm

Not only was Shred not entirely aware what a bard was, he wasn't entirely aware of what was actually happening either.

He quickly checked his surroundings after an awkward pause and realized that big shit was going down. Like, "time to actually do things" shit.

He grabbed onto Nas tight with one arm, and found a kazoo in one of his pockets. It was going to have to do for dramatic entrance music.

"Hey baby, I'm paying attention to the story now," he whispered into Nas' ear, playing something very vaguely approximating something musical. "Let's make love. No, wait, an entrance."

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Orandulum
Spurt Reynolds


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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Sun Aug 17, 2014 2:57 pm

This mission was suddenly looking better than it had for past half hour. There were enemies to fight and a man was holding on to him from behind and whispering in his ear. It was like being back in Classical Greece, one of Naṣāru's favorite times to be alive. "Indeed!" He responded with enthusiasm before proceeding to take off down into pit in a spiral fashion. A blazing trail left behind in their wake.

Upon reaching ground level, Nas aimed the Wind wheel at one of the twins whilst leveling the Fire wheel at another."Huǒ Feng!" he bellowed, causing a razor wind and a stream of flames to fly towards their targets.

Having finally recovered from the shock of losing control of his own body for a moment, No.351 took stock of the enemies. "Enemy: The Mendoza twins. Direct combat not available, Enemies too fast. Indirect combat it is then." 30% of his tank drained and the changes began. The Flashmancer's stomach began to expand a good size whilst his arms became thicker then before. Holes quickly appeared in the palms of his hands which were quickly bordered by nozzle like ridges of bone. No.351's swollen stomach suddenly started shrinking as some kind of adhesive sludge spewed out of the hand holes. With careful precision No.351 got to work covering as much of the walls as he could, from 4 meters and downwards.
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Melexiious
The Fabulous


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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Sun Aug 17, 2014 3:08 pm

Umbrage slowly stopped, and turned around in reaction to the sound of a loud bang..
"You hear something?" He asked simply.

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1337ness_of_teh_n00b
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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Mon Aug 18, 2014 10:05 pm

Well shit, it was "doing things time" again.

He decided he didn't like his kazoo, and threw it at one of the twins like some kind of kazoo-shuriken thing... a kazooriken.

"Eat kazooriken like your mum did last night!"

Genius bardwork.

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Cracked Atlas
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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Tue Aug 19, 2014 12:33 pm

"Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck." Dalia started climbing up the wall with astonishing speed, before breaking into a run on the vertical wall face, in order to dodge the wheel fire, sure why not. Eventually, she reached one of the ridges and stopped on it looking down. "Well, this is going to crap."
Eva, on the opposite wall chose instead to slide down to avoid the wheel fucking wind or whatever, and found herself on the same part of the ridge that Alpha was calmly making his way up. Eva tried to block his way. "Do you maybe want to help at all? There's four of them now... maybe more." Alpha stopped for a second. "I'm sorry, I didn't think that you and your sister are completely useless. If you can't handle these Agency dogs, I'll kill you myself. Now, if you'll excuse me..." With that, Alpha pushed past Eva and continued on his way. Eva glared at him for a few seconds before being hit in the head with a kazoo. "Okay, what the hell?" Eva saw the guitarist on the floor below her, and pulling out a handful of her toothpicks, tossed them at his head. Specifically aiming for the eyes. Dalia, about 50 feetabove her took this as a cue to toss some of her own toothpicks at Nas, with the intent on paralyzing him.

Meanwhile, Alise and Umbrage reached the central chamber. Alise walked to the edge of the pit and looked down at the chaos below. "Well. Guess we better deal with this." She breifly weighed the pros and cons of using he fairly large wings in such an enclosed, underground space, but then recalled that she was a billion year old completely immortal great old one, and that she'd probably be fine. With that, she jumped into the pit.

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Last edited by Cracked Atlas on Tue Aug 19, 2014 8:16 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Melexiious
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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Tue Aug 19, 2014 12:44 pm

"Ah bu wh-" Umbrage tried to say, before seeing Alise fly off into the pit. Leaving him by himself, 'shitshitshit' Umbrage thought to himself as he assesed the situation, most people were paired off except for one lone guy slowly making his way up a ramp. Umbrage weighed the situation, and preped his jet-pack. "fuckit" he uttered under his breath and flew into the air.

He kept his relative distance from the fighting, but kept a keen eye on Alpha. He latched himself onto the roof and quickly turned the jet-pack off. Watching to see what Alpha had planned.

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Orandulum
Spurt Reynolds


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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Tue Aug 19, 2014 11:07 pm

Nas saw the toothpicks heading his way and made a decision. Sure he could probably dodge/block them if he wanted too, but that would put him on the defensive unnecessarily. Instead Naṣāru held both Wind-and-Fire Wheels pointing towards the attack and it's source. "Huǒ Feng!" He intoned once more, except the results were a little different. Rather then a solitary gust of razor wind and stream of fire, what manifested could more aptly be described as a mono directional firestorm. Whilst the wheels were by themselves rather formidable weapons, their true potential was realized when used together. The wind would feed the fire and create an attack that  has been used to decimate armies in ages lost. Granted it wasn't particularly damaging to a single strong foe, but it was a lot harder to dodge then most other attacks.
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1337ness_of_teh_n00b
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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Thu Aug 21, 2014 8:46 pm

Shred saw the toothpicks, and wasn't really sure what to do about them. He rummaged his pockets far quicker than reasonable and found... another kazoo? No, seriously, why had he packed so many kazoos?

He put it to his lips and blew, guiding the toothpicks into the kazoo. A-ha, kazoo blowpipe.

With a little composition of his own, The Flight of the Bumblepick, he fired them back, and threw the kazoo after them, then went back to searching for a more dignified instrument.

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Tunnel Snakes Rule



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PostSubject: Re: The Agency   Sun Aug 24, 2014 1:35 pm

"I knew I should have sprung for that enhanced rebreather deal that was in my junk mail, would have been better than some prince of Nigeria contacting me about a hidden bank account in my name." Lister said as the harmless mustard gas burned his nostrils. "These twins are still too fast to shoot, so I'd better come up with something that's not completely stupid." Using his tomahawk, and a grapple hook, he threw it down at one of the twins, know that it would probably miss, he manipulated the axe with the rope, changing position constantly and herding the twins into a an area where they could easily be taken out by the rest of the party, when suddenly, the axe hit one of the twins, lodging itself in her left shoulder. "Hey Dalia! POWER SLAM! Lister retracted the hook, bringing himself down to the pit, using his momentum and body weight to crush her.


((OOC: I'm really sorry for the hold up gents, there's no excuse and I really wouldn't be surprised if Jordan killed me off in a few posts.))
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